Quick technical tip - a small trick you can use to improve a given point, but one that I see very few people utilize. Which is, repeating key phrases while writing a list. For example, writing “We give your employees the tools to be proactive, and to be successful” instead of just writing “We give your employees the tools to be proactive and successful.”
There are many more examples out there, and many other situations where I write it this way. I do it, first, because I like the timing better. It’s often true that less words=better writing, but it’s also often true (as in the example above), that too few words lacks rhythm. Sometimes you need to extend the sentence to make it sound right, and to put emphasis on the right parts.
Which brings me to the second reason - that repeating the key phrase places the right emphasize on each item. In the sentence above, without “to be” repeated again, the second item (successful) loses much of its power. True, the meaning of “successful” is still derived from the words that set up the list, “to be”, but by the time we get to it, we forget what those words were, and the point loses its emphasis. Sometimes, to make your point (or to drive it home), you have to repeat phrases.
Doing so, either partially or as a whole, is often more rhythmic, and more clear. So, even though english teachers would have you write everything in a straight-forward list, you need to check it out. Say it out loud, then make a call; either can be right in a given situation… but don’t be afraid to go with what sounds right to you.
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